Tuesday, August 22, 2006

I don't even know

I don't even know what happened today. Swichi and I had made plans to hang out, spend the day together, and he called me just before 10 like we had planned. He started bragging to me how he spent $250 on food yesterday. I was stunned! On Sunday I had told him that I need him to pay me back before he buys anything else. So I go over there and he has bought food and candles and a few other things. I didn't know what to say. FInally I did bring up what I had said on Sunday night and he snaps at me! He says that he told me (he didn't actually but he says he did) that he would pay me back with his next two paychecks and the money he spent on food and stuff was from his parents to buy food and stuff for his new place. He said "I'm not going to give that money to you!" I don't know...he is right but it still feels wrong. So I cried and he got pissy and I wanted to leave and he yelled at me. I could tell he wanted me to leave too but he also wanted me to drive him to the UPS store and school and stuff so he said just enough nice things to keep me there. But then once we were in the car he said a few jems that made me want to throw up and cry. Anyway.... We ran the errands we needed to and then I wanted to run by my house real quick to turn on the a/c since it was warmer outside then I thought and he was all bitchy about going 'all the way' there but finally said it would be ok. Then he stayed in the car while I went in...how nice.

We went to his place and he made himself hotdogs, didn't ask me if I wanted any, and we watched a movie and he told me how a friend of his was reading my blog and asking him questions about me and him and stuff. So Hi Erica.... And then he decided he wanted to go downtown to look around before his work and started looking for his messenger bag. It was no where to be found so I asked him if he had taken it with him to the grocery yesterday when he took a taxi home and he instantly realized that he had left it in the back of the cab. He calls them up and they said its not there. We get into my jeep, with his bike in the back, and he calls the taxi company again and they still say they don't have it. He hangs up and is cursing and slamming his hand on the window and door...this is also after he slammed the car door when he got in. I drive to the taxi company office and he goes inside, comes back out a few minutes later, empty handed, and slams the door again. I park in the packing garage and just as we are about to get out his phone rings. He talks on it while we walk through the mall, he talks on it as we walk around the Home Port store. He talks and talks and ignores me for 20 minutes. I almost just left, I should have. Finally I walk over to him, he's been wandering around not paying any attention to me this whole time, and ask him if he'll be on his phone for a long time and he shrugs. I just couldn't take it anymore.... So I left. He yelled at me telling me to wait but I didn't. So he runs after me and calls me a bitch and something else that I couldn't hear. He storms to my car and takes his bike out and slams the tailgate down and walks off. He didn't hug me. He always hugs me.

So I guess its over. I don't expect to hear from him. And I don't know what more I can do. I just couldn't sit there and walk behind him while he talks on his phone anymore. I have to deserve his attention when we were together. Bethie and I have had this exact same problem before...I just can't walk behind someone while they are talking and talking on their cellphone, ignoring me. I just think it is wrong. I have been so unhappy this past week, more then usual...I don't exactly know why and I know I haven't been easy for him to be around but I just wish he could love me for who I am, not just because I spend all my money on him and drive him around and do his schoolwork for him. Why can't he love me? Why can't anyone love me?

I'm crying...I thought I'd tell you in case you didn't know already. I guess once again I gave too much and lost the person I love and care about. And he wasn't even my boyfriend...just my friend. I wonder if I'll ever hear from him again.... I have to go, late for dinner at mt parents house with my dad. I'll write more later. L, E

Comments:
Switchi is a punk ass son of a bitch. He damn well could have used his money from his mommy to pay you back. Don't count on seeing it now.

Erin, you HAVE to ditch this guy. Don't take his calls anymore. Forget the cash, forget the whole thing. He has no respect for you or your belongings (your jeep) and he is USING YOU. You can be kind and sweet and tip toe around him but you are wasting your time. He will not change.

Is it worth it to have someone around for company who is going to take your money and damage your property, in the end COSTING you more money? Hell no.

Too bad you didn't keep his snakes as collateral until he paid you back.

If you have his mommy & daddy's phone number, you should call them and ask them to pay you back what he owes you.

Seriously, I wish I lived there so I could occupy your time and keep you busy so you wouldn't rely on that dipshit for company.

Anyone who makes you cry is not worth your time, and the friend who IS worth your time, won't ever make you cry.

There is nothing wrong with being a bitch Erin. I promise you I'm probably the biggest bitch you'll ever meet, but nobody abuses my friendship either. Remember:

B: Babe
I: In
T: Total
C: Control of
H: Herself
 
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