Monday, July 31, 2006
Ooops, another week gone by
Monday...didn't do much all day until class. Got my essay back in class and was happy with my 82. After class Swichi and I were suppose to go to the movies but instead we had a fight and I cried. I don't even really know what happened except I am sick of sitting on his bed watching him look around at Ebay and ignore me. It wasn't a nice fight, not that many are. I cried and he yelled. Then I left. Went home and cried more. Called ZamMan back (he had called me before I was home from class) and he was actually fairly comforting even if he wouldn't let me come over. But I did cry myself to sleep that night.
Tuesday...Swichi called me early, around 9:30 and was like "are you okay?" We spent the whole day together, shopping and going around for air brushing stuff since he has some idea that he's going to get paid to air brush tattoos on people. We'll see. I was feeling a lot better about him until at one point when he said that last night he had been worried that since I was "mad" at home that I would kill his snakes (cut off their heads) or let them outside to "go free". I really was hurt and offended that he would think I'd kill innocent animals just because he's an asshole.
Wed...I soent the day relaxing at home and working on my essay for class that night. Powered through my schoolwork and had a nap before class. Swichi called me about an hour before class and said he was going to skip since he hadn't done his essay. Oh well. After class I went to his dormroom and then we went to Friendly's for dinner.
Thursday...LONG day for me! I had been called by the temp agency I'm signed up with and they asked me if I'd do a mailing job and I said yes since it was easy and quick. Stuck the labels on a whole bunch of flyers for some union nonprofit and then went to Old Navy before going home for a quick nap and then to Xmas Trees from 5:30-9:30.
Friday...Dad and Mom came home from Europe. I went to Costco and bought a big pretty bunch of flowers for them and then went to their house and they bitched at me for about 20 minutes about my grades....not so nice but what I expected from them. Then I went to work at Xmas Trees again 5:30-9:30, busy night!
Saturday...I finally met SJ. We'd been talking on IM for probably 4 months and I had been pushing to meet for awile but he was busy and not ready I guess. So Laurey and I met him in the parking lot of his place of work in Williston and we sat on the grass and talked for almost 4 hours. It was nice I guess...except when it was raining! I was soaked but its all part of the experience, right? Then Lau and I went home and relaxed.
Sunday...Worked 9-5:30 and was exhausted! Beautiful day finally, in the 70's with wind and sunshine. Wish I could have been outside all day but Laurey and I did take a walk when I got home, even though I was hurting. Then I crashed on the sofa for an hour, had a very nice phone coversation with My Favorite Canadian and then tried to sleep but the insomnia kicked in. Talked on IM with SJ for awile...he 'loved' the housewarming presents I had given him so that was nice...said he wanted to take me to dinner so we'll see if that happens. Finally fell asleep....
Today, Monday...Spent the day with Swichi again. We bought a new, bigger cage for his snakes and he feed them and I changed the bedding in Lola's cage. Then we played with Laurey and watched his Bojangles the snake discover every corner of his cage over and over. Bojie and Eileen are getting really big, fast! Then Swichi worked on his essay for class and I played with Laurey and took a nap. Now I'm sitting on Swichi's bed waiting for classtime to come and typing here.
I'm going to start blogging more, I know I should and I want to, just a combination of lazy, not home as much and unhappy. I need to get my school classes and stuff for fall figuered out, will work on that tomorrow and let you know...:) L, E
Sunday, July 23, 2006
Her name is Lola and she's a beautiful white mouse! Swichi had to feel his snakes before the move and insisted on buying a live mouse but His big snake didn't go for the mouse right away and it was so horrible holding it there that he decided that she could be a pet instead. TG! So Lola is in a cage with some cheese and peanuts. I have a feeling we will be fighing over who gets to keep her when he takes his snakes to his new room but I really want to keep her so hopefully I can. She's so cute!! I'm going to buy her a running wheel tomorrow and some mousie treats! Laurey doesn't even seem to care that we have some visitors but that doesn't surprise me. She never watches the TV or anything like that so I didn't think the snakes would effect her.
Swichi took me to dinner at the restaurant he works at again, he had a 'free dinner for two' certificate since he won some contest. The food was good, but not exceptional. I was a little annoyed because he said we were getting dessert so I didn't eat all of my meal but then I guess he changed his mind since he asked for our check...oh well. Wed we had made plans to go and see a movie today but he decided he wanted to play poker so he called some friends and made plans. Right in front of me. I really hate when he's (and anyone else when I'm with them) on his phone, its really rude. Oh, and this was after when we were leaving the restaurant, he told me "wait right here" and left me in the entryway while he walked around and talked with people. I stood there for about 1 minute andthen went outside and looked in store windows for another 8 minutes before he even came out to look for me. I really don't like being left to just stand by myself while he goes and talks with people. He did that to me last time we were there too, except then I was sitting at the bar so at least I was sitting and had a salt shaker to twirl. I don't know if he's just stupid, doesn't care or thinks so little of me. I think I need to start protecting myself more in this 'relationship'.
So another week is starting.... I hope you had a nice weekend. L, E
The snkes haven't made the move to my house yet, should this evening. I picked Swichi up from his work last night but he was too tired and I didn't want to bring them to my house alone, so we are going to tonight. He liked my red hair too I think...he said it "looks good".
Today is nice and cool, in the 70's, and it was raining this morning but now the sunshine has come out. Going to leash Laurey in a few and have a nice walk...just hope my sneakers don't get too wet and muddy.
Oh, I left my sweatshirt in the back of ZamMan's car Friday night...was it an accident or just an excuse to see him again...I'll never tell! L, E
Friday, July 21, 2006
Clerks II, RED
I have red hair now. Its quite redish. Not what I thought it would be but it turned out just how it looked on the box so I have no idea what I really was thinking would happen to my hair. I can't decide if it looks good. ZamMan said "Its fine, looks ok" (Isn't he so helpful!) so that didn't really help me. I work tomorrow night so that should be the "big test". I'll let you know...:) L, E
Thursday, July 20, 2006
Snakes.... Yes, I have some living on my deck but now I will have 2 living in a cage in my house. Swichi has 2 snakes, bow pythons, and he's not allowed to have then in his dorm room. But he got them anyway and someone turned him in to the RA so he has until Sunday to 'lose them'. He asked me if they could stay at my house until the end of August when he moves into a new dorm/apartment and should be able to sneak them in again. I didn't have any real problem with them coming to live at my house until I realized he would want to keep dead mice in my freezer...yuck! But then when I was hanging out with him in his room last night, he went to check on his snakes and realized that Bojangles wasn't in the cage. So we tore apart his room and found him cuddled up in the closet so it was alright but I do NOT want Bojangles or Eileen slithering around my house! Laurey is scared of snakes and hopefully would run from them but if she decided to EAT the free reptile I don't know how I could deal with that. So...Saturday night Bo and Eileen will be moving over to my house...I'll keep you updated.
So back to my friendship with Swichi.... Last night after class we went down to Church Street (pedestrian mall) and listened to some kids playing their violins (they were very good and Swichi's new friends since he has been hanging out with them for the pasy few days) and he didn't introduce me to them. Then we went to the resturant that he works at for dinner, and he didn't introduce me to anyone there (again, we had visited there a couple of weeks ago too) and pretty much left me sitting at the bar alone while he talked with his co-workers. So I chatted with a guy who was a couple of seats down but pretty much I twisted the salt shaker around and around.... We had dinner and the food was very good, he paid but that is because he gets 50% off. Then we walked over to the drugstore so he could buy some art supplies for some project he's doing and guess what...he let ME pay for that.
I guess I'm just different. I always make sure to introduce people and include them in the conversations. Is that just because I'm "too nice"? Monday night after class I asked him if he wanted to get together on Tues to work on our essays/homework that was due on Wed and he said no, I would be too distracting (ouch!) but then he calls me around 5 on Tues and asks me to read him the essay specifics, question. He was hanging out on Church Street with his new street performer friends and was going to do his essay there. Yeah right! Wednesday morning he called me...he hasn't done any of the work but 'needed' me to come over and 'help' him. His idea of help is I tell him what the answers are and what he should write about. So I went over to his room and 'helped' him while typing my own essay. Quite uncomfortable sitting on his bed (his sofa is covered with junk) but the worst part was that the ass nextdoor had left a DVD in his player and the whole time I was there, over and over, the 'Will and Grace' (NBC TV show) theme song played. DRIVING ME CRAZY! I finally left around 3:15 when I couldn't take it anymore. Went home and finish my essay on my own bed, in the a/c, with Laurey cuddled next to me.
So me and Swichi. We are friends. I guess just not the exact friends I wish we could be. Its very one sided...I give and he takes or he takes and I give. But I am happy he's in my life believe it or not. He is an amazing young man and has so much potential, he'll go very far in life. I'm lucky he's my friend...but not as lucky as he is to have me. L, E
Monday, July 17, 2006
Heat Wave tries to Kill Me!
I hung out with Swichi again Thurs and did his laundry for him. I don't know if we'll have a lasting friendship out of what we have now but I think I do want it. We tried to work together on our essays for history class Tues night but first he took a nap and then played a car game on his computer so that didn't work. I did the reading but couldn't get into the essay with him being so distracting. I asked him tonight if we could work together on our next essay tomorrow but he said no, too distracting. While I know he's right I would rather work with someone then alone...oh well. We got our essays back today and I got an 88, B+ and so did he.
I have heard from my dad twice in email and got a postcard from him today too. Sounds like their trip/hike in Eurpoe is going well. He said its been hard hiking but beautiful scenery. Haven't heard anything from mom so I have no idea what the means since she is usually the one to send the huge book length emails.
My dish network has been cut off, need to pay the bill. So I just have the local channels to watch until Wed when I get my paycheck. Put $20 for gas into my jeep yesterday and it wasn't even 1/2 a tank. *sigh* I know I shouldn't be running the a/c in there when I'm driving but I can not take the heat! Have been sick all day...sitting down kind not throwing up...and I don't know if its from the heat/humidity or something else but it is killer outside! I've had the a/c on high all day and its still 75ish in my house right now.
I've had so many things going around in my mind. I'm trying. I really want to try. I just don't know how not to sleep when I'm at home. How not to feel so sad. So lonely. L, E
Monday, July 10, 2006
quite not pleased
Last night I wasn't doing well at all. Crazy lonely, wanting to cry but not able to. Just wanted to be hugged, have my hair rubbed, maybe cuddled to sleep. But I was alone. Always alone. L, E
Sunday, July 09, 2006
I am nice
I have a very strong desire to please people
have my own condo
I can bake very yummy chocolate chip cookies
I drive fast, sometimes very agressively
I have a doggie named Laurey
I like to do laundry
Yankees baseball fan
Rangers hockey fan
I have a best friend named Bethie
I am online a lot
Use AIM and Yahoo IM
I go to college, student
Work part time
I like burning candles
I have lots of DVD movies
Love going to the movie theatre
Like cooking dinner
Having friends over
Using salon bought shampoo and conditioner
Chocolate ice cream
Ice cream cake
Soft skin, curves
Give back rubs
Favorite scents: rose, honeysuckle
Not always patient
Flannel pj pants
Love talking on the phone
Will do anything for my friends
Outdoors, tree hugger
Ambition to have fully supportive job
Favorite colors: blue, yellow, pink
Fish named Superman
No cellphone, digital camera, webcam
So that all I have come up with so far but I will be adding more I'm sure. L, E
wkend and a new topic
I had an idea/thought I wanted type about today but can't remember. Oh well. Not even hungry. *sigh* L, E
PS- And I'm considering canceling my phone since I only seem to get maybe 3 phone calls a week and 2 of them are wrong numbers or telemarketers. Other then my favorite Canadian calling me, no one else does.
Friday, July 07, 2006
Since you are too cowardly to leave your NAME in your post on my blog, I have to guess at who you are. I am also going to go out on a limb and assume you are the jerk-off who left me the anoymous post back ion Valentines day saying you would send me flowers and candy but never did. Thanks for that BTW. Yes, you have asked me out and I have said yes. Then when I say when and what do you want to do you just say "whatever you want, whenever you want". If you would like to ask me for a date then do so. Say "Erin, would you like to go to dinner with me around 7 on Friday night?" Is that too hard?! I guess it is. I don't need the flowers and candy and cheesy romance but I do need a specific date if you are asking me out. DOES THAT MAKE SENSE TO YOU!?! As I would think you can tell I am very NOT pleased about your asshole post. You have often made little cutting remarks to me about how you liked me but "gave up" and were so hurt by me....well you are a flake! You talk to me for awile then disapear for weeks and months at a time. You never commit to a date. And you say I am just about IM. Whatever...fuck off. I DID want to go out to dinner with you but now...you can just stick your finger in your ass and have that all alone.
PS- And I'm not even in a bad mood. I just will not take being made to feel bad for YOUR OWN ACTIONS AND DECISIONS!
Thursday, July 06, 2006
I ment to but....
My IM friend SJ pointed out to me last night that I am always annoyed with one friend or another. He said that I'm always moody and annoyed and grumpy and I was really taken back by that since I don't think of myself as a really moody person. I know right now I am more unhappy then I would like, but I am trying. At least I think I am trying. I know I have been more annoyed lately then normal but that is because I have a few friends that have been taking advantage of me but I have been letting them so maybe I'm annoyed with myself. I know I am annoyed with me more then I would like. I'm a giver. I am embracing that part of me and hoping in doing that I won't be so down on myself for the giving in me and the giving I do.
Last night I had plans to work on my history final with Swichi and he invited another friend, H, to come over to my house. I was really annoyed at first that he invited someone else to my house without asking me but he really didn't mean any harm in it and H is a sweetie and we worked well together. I don't know. I told two friends on IM about how he invited H over w/o asking and 1 said it was crazy rude and the other said it was no big deal...so I guess it just how I feel. I think I wanted to be annoyed with Swichi so I used that as even more of an excuse. Oh, and I had him bring him laundry over and I washed it all for him and even folded it up all nice and neat. Anyway....
My parents are out of the country for 3+ weeks. They are in Europe, hiking around the Matterhorn mountain and (I hope) having fun. I went and saw "Superman Returns" with both of them Tues evening and I while I was disapointed in the movie, they didn't disapoint with the lecture and cold cutting comments. Actually it was my dad who threw in the huge, hurtful dig about my working at the Xmas Tree Shops that really surprised me. I thought they would be happy I am working. I picked a job that was easy and I wouldn't bring home at all (except the hurting legs/feets) and very flexable. I guess they don't approve. Oh well. He gave me $100 "for emergencies only" and I've already spent about 1/2 of it...:) My 'emergency' was that I was broke and needed food and a new notebook for my new history class.
Yesterday during my break between my classes I was a mad cleaning woman! I vaccuumed and scrubbed the bathroom/shower. Did laundry and emptied the dishwasher. Picked up all the dog toys and fluffed up Lau's dogbed. My house looks so nice! I didn't realize how much I needed to scrub clean my house, not just pick up, and I was really happy when it was all done. Need to wash my bedsheets today and then try to keep on top of the cleaning again.
Started my next history class last night. The teacher seems fun, wacky like my last teacher but a different wacky. This class has ever more reading and many more papers/essays so I'm a little worried about that but I will see how it goes. I spoke with the scheduling guy at my job and told him that I can't work more then 3 days a week. The next 2 weeks I have such bitch hours! 5:30-9:30 pm (really 10 since we get out late always) on Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Its not too bad, just sucks working at 5 since I do nothing all day and then only working 4+ hours is lame and I don't get a break at all. Plus Fri and Sat are date nights! But who am I kidding...no date for me.
Oh, I think my snakes are gone! My property manager bought me some "Snake Away" and I sprinkled it all around my deck and then sent Lenny on a flying ride into the bushes. He did come back, I saw him out there with Snoop but that was a few days ago and I haven't seen them again so maybe they are out looking for a new home. And I saved a bird on Monday. The poor sparrow was caught in the matting in the grass and his little legs were all tangled up. I tried to cut him out by thearing the matting with my keys but that didn't work so I ran upstairs and grabbed my scissors and cut him out. He wasn't so grateful that I was helping him...he pecked me at first but settled down the tiniest bit when I was cutting him out. Once he was free of the matting his little legs were still tangled so I had to hold him by his wing and clip more plastic away but I was able to and then he hopped around a little. I hope he just needed a rest and then he flew away to a nice tree and is all happy...:)
So what's up? Oh, I bought a really cute new jean skirt from Old Navy and it fits perfect and I love it. I know I shouldn't have spent money on clothes but I have been in such a skirt mood and while I don't need to dress up for work, I'd rather wear a skirt then shorts there and I think a skirt with sneakers is cute too. I had bought another skirt too from Old Navy online but I didn't like it too much so I went and returned it yesterday and looked around the store and it was really empty, not much in there. But they are moving into fall/winter...stocking up on jeans.
Ok...so I hope you are good and smiling. I am working on getting my smile back. Not being so annoyed with my friends. Not being so annoyed with me. And saying no when I should. And walking with Laurey, everyday! Miss you and love you! L, E